The son of Irish potato farmers, Scott was born in a freshly sown field during a blazing full moon in the early morning hours of the fourth of July (The year of our lord is being researched by freelance anthropologists).
Homeschooled by the family’s only literate neighbor, a fireman and “clothes-free” advocate, he ran away as soon as his young legs would carry him (during the potato blight of ’89) and performed as “BB” (Bullwinkle Barishnikov), a traveling sideshow where he attracted audiences with promises of ‘free whiskey tasting’ and then abused each of their five senses with his interpretation of post-modern ballet. These controversial “dance” routines are rumored to have been seasoned liberally with moshpit pirouettes.
Interviews reveal that SR believed that the Rocky and Bullwinkle children’s television cartoon was based on the life of an actual Russian moose who spoke English in a condescending manner.
Audiences soon grew angry once Scott championed prohibition in the shire (he was actually just out of whiskey and silver). But, due to his controversial dance performances and constant stock of taters, he was trailed by hungry talent agents across the countryside. Always fiercely independent, he hand-picked his own agent, hiring Saugus McMoughin to serve as his representation in all territories.
With Mr. McMoughin, Scott recorded his first album Tastes Like Yesterday which went on national radio and rose to #5 on the international electro-polka charts. Always reinventing his mad dulcimer-specked-harpsichord-freestyling, he released the heavy metal/acid jazz anthem Gnaw My Knickers to critical acclaim, but public uproar. Shortly after it hit the airwaves and the successive “uncensored” version of the “music” “video” was released, he was deported to the United States on public indecency charges.
Shunned by his home country, Scott boarded the US bound S.S. Andalusia in defeat. He now divides his time between creating epic cinematic television series for tiny interweb audiences, writing anti-Irish propaganda, and his cutting-edge tofu recycling business.